Wednesday, October 20, 2010

First Things First: Are You In An Unhealthy Relationship?

The reasons for staying in a violent relationship are many, and vary for each person. (One reason is all you need, but reasons may include:

Fear of the perpetrator's future vengance.
The risk of being killed when leaving.
Fear that protection orders and the criminal justice system will not protect her.
Lack of economic resources with which to support herself and her children.
The desire to keep her children with their father.
Being told by family or friends that the abuse would stop if she mellowed out, submitted more, acquessed, changed.
Suicide threats from the perpetrator.
Threats of violence to others (kills the cat, threatens the children) by the perpetrator.
Dependence on the perpetrator for healthcare.
Lack of affordable housing.
Lack of affordable legal assistance necessary to obtain a divorce, custody/visitation plan, or protection order.
Lack of faith in systems designed to help victims.
Inability to speak up clearly for oneself without emotional display.
Inability to speak English fluently.
Lack of access to resources due to physical isolation.
Seventy-five percent of women killed by partners or ex-partners are murdered while attempting to leave or after leaving the relationship. One theory suggests that batterers see a partner's efforts to leave as an ultimate refusal to be controlled. Killing her may be the only way to maintain control. Leaving can be dangerous.



Starting A New Day




Wow, this is probably the longest wild-ride stretch I have 

had in years!  I wonder if anyone else has withdrawal 

symptoms from wild-rides, like I am having! I am grateful 

for the fact that I have my stash of healthy foods and 

recipies that I nurture myself with or I would never make it 

through even the littlest wild-rides let alone the withdrawal 

process, shake, shivver and sigh! Actually I have found that 

every withdrawal leads to yet another wild-ride. Maybe it's 

addiction, but I seem to making headway with my mission 

whatever the label one gives my personal style! 


I have to announce, I’m starting to use facebook now, 
maybe once a week. I need a helper however. Someone to 

phone me up and help focus me ...mostly for mutual 

business support and promotions. So don't look for me 
there if you are sensitive to the word business.

As for muse news ... my muse and I have both been working 

hard. We hybernated alone and together with BlogTalkRadio for 3 days last week all business and love talks of course.  Our new best friends. I am still reeling from trying to understand all the social media telecommunications jargon.

Happily my old friends haven't given up on me; they understand my need for hiding out often, doing my dream-work and drawing new ideas and renewed strenght from the written and spoken word via the internet. I really am grateful for the like-minded people I have in my life, we all seem to understand that new friends are the life-blood of any project or mission.

Sadly I haven't seen any of my friends from the Self 

Sufficiency Group at all.. I caught up with my friend Flora, from Canada, who I 

met at a art-activist workshop one evening. Flora is absolutely 

invogorating; we want to start an art-activist business Meetup/networking 

group. Muse, Carla and I also went to Tenino once to listen to a 

friend of mine playing back-up at a concert. His group is going to Russia to 

compete internationally and are very excited about that. We 

toured the Wolf Preserve and had a very fabulous dinner at Alice's Restaurant on Johnson Creek afterwards.

I also finished my website and gallery ... well ... finished is 

never the issue in the real world, is it? No. My 

essays, gallery and experience pages will of course be growing and changing 

all the time, as with pages like my workship news page. 

Trumpte Blast Here: I have a $100. reward for the 

person who finds the most mistakes and makes suggestions how to correct them, as well as presenting me with the most useful and unique ideas I could impliment without tooooooo mucccccccch trouuuuuuble. I want 

to make my website as wonderful as possible so I can be as excellent an 

asset to my readers and art buyers as possible. I am looking 

to the world of bright communicators to give me their best 

hints. In return I have a lot of contests planned for the near 

future. 
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